


Agatha H and the Spark Museum

by Moontyger



Category: Girl Genius (Webcomic)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 02:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17050946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moontyger/pseuds/Moontyger
Summary: The Omerton Museum of Historical Science and Technology has a strict No Sparks Allowed policy.  Too bad it also has artifacts Agatha needs and Sparks have never been great at following rules.





	Agatha H and the Spark Museum

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gutterandthestars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gutterandthestars/gifts).



“This shouldn’t be necessary,” Agatha complained, to no one in particular. Her eyes were wide behind her glasses as she tried to see simultaneously ahead and above; her hands were curled tight around the levers of the giant clank she was driving, but she had plenty of attention left for talking. “All I wanted was to look at the inventions in their Heterodyne collection. They should be glad to let me look at them! Who else is so likely to understand them?”

“That’s what they’re afraid of,” Tarvek pointed out. He was standing close enough that in other circumstances she might have considered him to be hovering, but the clank hadn’t been meant to carry this many people, so he didn’t have much choice. “People remember the Heterodynes – all of them. They like you, but they don’t trust you.”

Agatha sighed, but she couldn’t really argue. _She_ knew she was trustworthy, but she hadn’t had much chance to prove it. 

“Stealing them isn’t likely to change their mind,” Gil added from his position crammed in behind Agatha and almost on top of Tarvek, but it was far too late to turn back now that they were inside a clank striding on four sturdy metal legs across the ocean floor, heading for the underwater and hence least guarded entrance into the Omerton Museum of Historical Science and Technology. 

“They didn’t leave me much choice.” Had she thought there’d been any chance at all to talk the museum director into allowing her inside, she’d have kept trying, but he’d been both very firm and very clear in his absolute refusal to even consider the prospect. After that conversation, Agatha had asked Gil and Tarvek for help; they had the sort of political connections she still lacked. But they insisted those connections would be of no use here and, given their willingness to come along with her now, it seemed unlikely that this had been anything but the truth. There were things about her ancestors that Agatha needed to understand; questions that demanded answers. The inventions and materials inside the museum might not provide all of those answers, but she had hopes that they would at least give her somewhere to start.

“There it is: the Mighty Squid-shark!” Zeetha had been watching their back, looking for any sign of the famed aquatic guardian of the museum.

Agatha glanced upwards curiously, but all she could see through the murky water was a huge shadow passing above them. That was for the best; she didn’t really want to fight it.

But that, of course, was too much to hope for. The shadow darkened, becoming ever larger, blocking out so much light that she couldn’t see where they were going and had to hope she was still heading in the right direction.

A tentacle smacked onto the clear dome of the clank and it shuddered, then teetered dangerously as the squid-shark tried to latch on. “Hold on!” She slammed her left hand down on a large black button. It electrified the outside of the clank and the tentacle withdrew, which was good. It did not electrocute the people inside the clank, which was even better. But it was a significant drain on power and the squid-shark was still circling them. If they had to shock it too many times, the clank would be frozen in place, too drained of power to move.

Agatha shoved a lever forward, turning their stride into a sort of bouncing run, trying to get close enough to the museum that they could avoid drowning. The squid-shark attacked again, biting down on the dome just above their heads. Luckily, the dome held, and the squid-shark swam off to circle once more.

Agatha didn’t dare look up to assess the damage; she had to concentrate on moving them forward as fast as possible. If she didn't pay sufficient attention, they could overbalance and then they'd be stuck. But she thought she glimpsed the imprint of giant teeth from the corner of her eye.

Perhaps the squid-shark was feeling the impact as well, because it lashed out with a tentacle once more, grabbing one leg and pulling rather than trying to bite. “Gil, flip that switch by your hand for me.”

Gil didn’t question her and the switch performed just as she’d designed it to, detaching the leg smoothly and leaving the clank free to continue its journey, albeit a rougher one now that they were down a leg.

They lost another leg and had to shock the squid-shark a second time, but the clank managed to limp its way to the pressure door attached to the museum, open it, and stagger inside, listing sadly to the left after it came to a halt.

The dome was too damaged to come off smoothly; it took the combined efforts of all four of them pushing to move it. Once the clank was open, they all clambered down and took a moment to catch their breath and look around.

Agatha looked at her clank first. It was much the worse for wear, with small cracks as well as the tooth imprints on the dome and slashes across the legs and body, not to mention the empty sockets where the missing legs had once fit. “I don’t think we can go back that way.” Sighing a little, she approached the clank and caressed its scarred side. “I’m sorry to abandon you, after you worked so hard getting us here.” Her clank couldn’t respond; she hadn’t given it a voice, but she hoped it understood. Perhaps it could become part of a new exhibit, which would presumably mean it would be treated well.

* * *

“It’s not locked.” Gil sounded surprised as he pushed open the door into the museum proper. Inside, all was dark and silent. There might be lights for night security, but if so, they were non-existent in this part of the museum.

“Which way to the Heterodyne exhibit?” Now that they were inside, Agatha was focused on her goal. She’d love to see the entire museum, but she knew they didn’t have time for that, and if she got started, she’d never be able to drag herself away.

“I’ve never been here before,” Gil confessed. “They don’t allow Sparks inside.”

“Wait. It’s a museum about Sparks, but they aren’t allowed to see it?” That was the stupidest thing Agatha had ever heard.

“Many people are fascinated by Sparks and their inventions. And they aren't entirely ignorant. Someone without the Spark won’t understand technology that could never be created without it in the same way as we would, but that doesn’t mean they can’t appreciate it at all.” Agatha wasn’t so sure, but she supposed Klaus’ experiments might have given Gil some insight she lacked.

“Sparks are also far more likely to take the exhibits apart,” Tarvek pointed out. None of them could deny it; Tarvek managed to at least not look openly uncomfortable at his own point, but Agatha and Gil both flushed. They didn’t mean to do it, but caught in the full force of their talent, it was impossible for any Spark to not use whatever materials might be at hand, even if they regretted it later.

“It’s a museum,” Agatha pointed out, trying to focus rather than dwell on a moment of awkwardness. “There must be a map or directory somewhere.”

“It’s not that kind of museum,” Gil explained. “It’s not open to the public. Anyone who wants to see the exhibits has to arrange a private tour.”

“Someone has to be giving those tours,” Zeetha pointed out. “This doesn’t seem like the sort of place where the owners do it personally.”

“Then let’s go find the office for the tour guides and see if they have a map.” Agatha’s suggestion was reasonable, but would have been easier to accomplish if they had been starting from the lobby. While it would have been far more obvious and hence left them far more likely to get caught by museum security, she was starting to think there were some good points to the argument for entering through the front door.

They trekked through five different rooms, up two staircases and down another before they found themselves in what was recognizably the lobby, spending time Agatha was far too conscious of on answering what should have been a basic question. Once there, however, the guide office was not difficult to find and the utilitarian wooden desk within contained both keys and a clearly labeled map of the museum.

“It’s larger than I expected,” Agatha commented, leaning over the desk and tracing a route to the Heterodyne exhibit with one finger. “There are exhibits for both the Wulfenbach and Sturmvoraus families in the same wing as the Heterodynes. I’d have thought your families would have been better about not leaving things lying around than mine.” The Heterodynes, after all, were famously chaotic. Perhaps it was only her own experiences speaking, but Agatha had expected more from the other old Spark families.

“You’ve met my family,” Tarvek said dryly. “Are you really so surprised?”

Agatha considered, then shook her head. “I suppose not. Did you want to take a look while we’re here?”

Tarvek shook his head. “I do better work on my own.”

“All right. It’s your choice.” Agatha picked up the map and headed out of the office, turning left and pausing at the bottom of a grand staircase. The steps were shallow, but wide enough for ten people to walk abreast, a strange choice for a place that only gave private tours. “It looks like we need to go up these, then take the third hallway to the right.”

“Wait.” Zeetha approached the stairs, frowning. “Something about these isn’t right.” Moving slowly, she slipped off one shoe. She held it in her hand for a moment as she gave the stairway a measuring sort of stare, then threw the shoe. It landed almost halfway up and toward the right side of the stairway. As soon as the shoe touched the stair, there was a loud sort of sizzle and a pinkish flash of light. When the light faded, the shoe was gone.

“I thought so.” Zeetha nodded in satisfaction.

“Hmm, interesting. They must be using some of the artifacts as traps for thieves instead of exhibits.” Gil looked thoughtful, staring at the place where the shoe had once been without seeming to actually see it. “I don’t think that was a distintegration. That flash didn't seem right for it. I think this uses some sort of shrink ray. The shoe is still there; it’s just too small to see.”

Zeetha slipped off her other shoe and handed it to Agatha. “It doesn’t really matter, because we aren't going to be hit by it. I can handle this.”

She backed up to the large stone doors of the main entrance and took off at a run. Just before the stairs, Zeetha leaped over them. When it looked like she wasn’t quite going to make it, she tucked her head in, turning the end of the leap into a roll that she landed on her hands, bare inches from the top of the stairs, before flipping upright. “Be right back,” she said, grinning, then disappeared around a corner.

Several crashes and bangs ensued in the direction she’d gone, then Zeetha reappeared, still barefoot, but now wearing an official-looking black hat and waving some sort of copper handheld device. “It’s safe to come up now. I took care of the guard while I was at it.”

Agatha didn’t hesitate to start up the stairs immediately. They were on a time limit, after all. “Did the guard say anything about other traps?”

Zeetha shrugged apologetically. “I didn’t give him time to say much of anything.”

“Keep your eyes open.” Gil didn't look around to observe the effect this momentary attempt to assert authority had on the others, simply continuing forward as though he, too, had an interest in the success of this adventure. Maybe he did. Agatha still didn't really know all the details, but she knew that Gil's father and her parents had known each other. If she could figure out where they'd gone, maybe even find them, it would change things for him, too.

Not that she really expected that, even if the exhibit actually included artifacts from her father and uncle. Instead, she hoped for insight into Mechanicsburg, maybe something to help her do more to free the city and fix the castle. Maybe something here would even help her understand the Jägerdraught, though that might be too much to hope for.

They didn’t have any more trouble until they reached the hallway that led to the exhibits of the old Spark families, House Heterodyne among them. This trap was far less subtle; whoever had installed it must have hoped its mere appearance would warn off any thieves. The walls and floor were alive with fire, streaks of it snaking from one side to the other with a loud and nearly constant sizzling hiss.

Zeetha held out the device she’d gotten from the guard, flipping switches and pressing buttons, but if it could be used to turn the fire off, she clearly didn’t know how to do it.

The others stared at it in dismay, tracing the path of the firebolts through the air and across the floor, trying to see a way through. With the right materials, Agatha was sure she could get them past this, but there was little to hand in the main hallway.

“I’ve seen this before.” Tarvek wore an expression of deep concentration as he knelt and tucked his pants legs into his socks. “This is one of my family's inventions, though I never knew there was more than one.”

“Do you know how to turn it off?” If she had to, Agatha would go exploring, see if they could get to any other exhibit halls to find inventions to cannibalize, but she’d prefer to avoid that if she could. There wasn’t that much time remaining before morning, when theoretically someone would at least come to relieve the guard.

“Yes, but I also know how to get through it. We use it train Smoke Knights.” Tarvek checked that his pants were secure, with no stray fabric hanging out to attract stray sparks, and got to his feet. “There’s a pattern to it; it’s just hard to see.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then another. Ten breaths altogether, then he opened his eyes and jumped forward, somehow landing safely on one foot in the midst of the burning field.

His movements as he crossed formed a sort of elaborate dance: ducking here, twisting there, pivoting on first one foot and then the other, always just ahead of the sizzling bolts. Watching him, Agatha thought there was more to it, that somehow he was spelling out a message with his movements, saying something in a language she could almost understand. Just when she thought she nearly had it, however, he was through, collapsed panting on the floor just on the other side of the field. “It’s been awhile,” he managed, lying there with eyes closed for a moment before he got up and did something to the wall near where he lay.

With a final hiss and some lingering smoke, the field turned off. Agatha’s ears ached at the sudden silence. This close, the bolts of fire had been _loud_.

Gil strode forward, offering Tarvek a hand up as he passed. For once, Tarvek took it without argument, slowing Gil down enough that Zeetha passed them, taking point as they entered the Heterodyne exhibit. From here, there was no doubt: over the door hung the trilobyte emblem of the family.

Agatha stopped and stared as soon as she stepped inside. The exhibit hall was dark, lit only by a skylight far above. The room was at least three standard stories in height. The walls were lined with glass cases, but other, larger exhibits stood out in the open. One, which appeared to be some sort of flying machine, hung suspended from the ceiling on cables.

There was far more here than Agatha had expected; more than she’d dreamed could exist. She wanted to spend days – no, weeks - exploring the hall, reading the placards and studying each invention in turn. And she had time for none of it.

“Spread out and gather everything you can,” she commanded, opening her bag and heading to the nearest case to follow her own instructions. “Then,” she continued, glancing upward at the flying machine, “I think we’ve found our way out of here.”


End file.
